With your eyes closed, 
Watching a strange show
Play out in your head,
But you were smiling somehow
And your day froze,
And everyone in it
Sat still as a rose,
But we were moving somehow.

Back to where we started,
Losing who we were,
Maybe we should only
Tip a bottle back to keep us filled up.

Back to where we started,
Losing who we were,
Everybody knows that,
You’d break your neck to keep your chin up.

Open your eyes,
And the drops come,
And a snail raced down to your neck,
And looked up,
But you were smiling somehow.

Back to where we started,
Losing who we were,
Maybe we should only 
Tip a bottle back to keep us filled up.

Back to where we started,
Losing who we were,
Everybody knows that
You’d break your neck to keep your chin up.

The only fair in life is in Dallas in the fall and Decatur in the Spring.

It was supposed to be different for you. We all knew it wouldn't be, but I wanted so badly for it to work for you. Please don't do something stupid. I don't know what to tell you, I don't even know what to tell myself. All I know is that it was supposed to be this way even though this way sucks and that I'll always be here for you.

It's not right. It's not fair. It's life. It sucks.





On the bright side: I went to the naturopathic doctor today. It was the only doctor's appointment I've been to where I feel like something is being accomplished, discovered, and it's being done by a wonderful woman that cares so much even though she doesn't know me. She's going to fix everything.

What Sarah Said

Everything on my mind at the moment:

1. I miss you so much.

2. Worst panic attack ever today. I need help.

3. Exhaustion.

4. I wish things would've worked out or had never happened.

5. Tonight was fun.

6. College history is going to be the death of me.

7. I'm so happy for you.

8. Tomorrow is a half day. The most exciting thing to happen in this town, well, ever.

9. I need you to not be hurt. Please, please, please don't lose it like I did. I can't watch that.

10. Christmas shopping needs to be done, but there's no time, money, or energy, so that'll be interesting.

11. I want this puppy. I saw her laying in Noah's Ark so sad and lonely. She was so much like me. I held her forever. I think the name Sarah fits her.